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1) Doggy health – I have to remind myself of this one a lot right now. My male dog is on a round of steroids after his arthritis began to flair up again. He’s up and running again, only now I’m dealing with one of the side effects: lots of pee. That he can’t hold.
2)Paying off credit cards- It was nice to pay off two lingering balances. Just one to go. This one has had to carry some unexpected, big doggy bills that came up this year. Nothing I can’t take care of in a couple of months.
3) Summer softball games – I have had so much fun taking my mom to watch my little brother play in a city league.
4) Lunch with work pals
- Great job evaluation
- Saturday lunch with a friend
- Sunday lunch with the family
- 4 day weekend after 6 straight shifts
- Cool front
- Drinks with co-workers after a long stretch at work
My 10-year reunion is tomorrow night.
I’m not exactly excited. In fact, I’m feeling curious more than anything else.
I am happy that I finally found a dress that I love. It is the perfect basic piece to dress up or down. I found some cute shoes to keep it more casual, though I plan to throw some strappy heels in the car just in case.
I don’t have a date for the night.
I hope I have a great time.
I wish there were a guide for people who didn’t particularly enjoy high school and who kept in touch with practically no one since then. I’m only going because of #19, #25, and #30 of my happiness project.
A friend from work has repeatedly told me that I needed to meet her brother. He’s home from med school for the holidays, so she’s excitedly arranged for us to meet tomorrow night.
I know nothing about him except that he’s her brother, he’s in med school, and all the other girls he’s dated are “bitchy vain stupid hoes.” For the record, when you’re trying to pimp out a family member, you should probably stick to his or her more positive characteristics.*
Oh, I do know one other thing.
He apparently had seen me a few days ago when he and my friend were shopping. He recognized me from a Facebook search after talking to his sister. (He told her he thought he’d seen me after the fact, and she texted to confirm my whereabouts.) He told her that I look much better in person**, and that I had an “ancient beauty.”
So, there’s a… plus?
I agreed for the sake of my ridiculously long dry spell and my happiness project***. And also my mother who commented (on Christmas!) that I might need to try one of those dating sites.
* Birds of a bitchy, vain, stupid, whorish feather flock together.
**I had hoped so.
**Happiness Project: #19, #25, #30. And for the possibility of #10.
He was really nice, but that’s about it. It was like hanging out with a brother. Still glad we met.
Dr. Awesome asked me out.
I agreed to meet him for lunch. I like the doctor I know. I was curious to see what he’d be like away from the hospital. There were mainly two concerns for me: work and age difference. Work I know I could be discreet with and handle if there were anything to seriously develop. (I share nothing about my dating life as it is.) I don’t even see him all that often at the hospital. I had no idea how much older than me he was. 10 years? More?
He is 43 and divorced for two years with a teenage daughter. The divorce wasn’t his choice. He’s been solely focused on work since then. He said he’s been debating whether or not to ask me out for six months. He had no idea I was 27. He said that I look young, but that I act older than the other nurses my age.
It was a refreshing date in how honest and straightforward we were both able to be with each other in what we wanted and were looking for. We had to be given the circumstances. He was as nice as I thought he’d be. We have a lot in common as far as our interests go, but I could never shake this nagging, uncomfortable feeling.
We finished dessert, and he asked me what I was thinking. I told him that I was uncomfortable with moving forward. I could see that he was ready for something immediate and serious. I was not. He was gracious and said then it wasn’t meant to be. He admitted that he probably would not have asked me out if he had known how young I was. He hoped that things wouldn’t be awkward for me at work now that I knew he liked me. I assured him that things would be as they had been before and that I was glad we met outside of work.
That horrible feeling went away. I felt light again and completely at ease. We talked a bit longer and hugged before separating.
This week’s Happiness Project resolution is to find some fun.
The video makes a point to note that just because something is fun for someone else doesn’t mean it’s fun for me. I’m often told by people my age (whether implied or direct) that I’m supposed to like to do certain things. A frequent example for me is clubbing. I don’t like it. It was never something I enjoyed to do – though I went along when I was in college, but most single people my age (that I know) go regularly. I think its fun on occasion, but otherwise I find the atmosphere boring with the same people and the same music. (It also often feels like a sad place to me. So many sad people acting out happiness in one room.)
The video also asks you to think back and remember what you found fun as a kid.
* I remember reading – a lot.
* I remember making clothes for my dolls and clothes for my cats. I remember being especially proud of a hat I made for my cat that was elasticized and had holes for her ears.
* I remember liking to learn new things – in particular, how to do/make new things. I used to spend my summers checking out different how-to books alongside my fiction books each week.
*I remember frequently asking my dad to teach me to dance whenever he played his Colombian music. He would always reply, “It’s in your blood. Move how you want to move.” I was unsatisfied, because I wanted to learn specific steps.
* I remember working on a little flower garden in front of our house every spring.
* I remember wishing my family was rich enough to travel.
I don’t recall many other activities except playing with my brothers and sisters. Our family was just barely breaking even, so there were not many chances for extracurricular activities.
*I still like to read, though I lost the habit for a while. The Cannonball Read has helped this year.
*I still like making things. Knitting has been one outlet. I’m interested in taking part in this on-line sewing class.
*I still like to learn. I look up any questions I have, whether at work or at home.
*I still am interested in Latin music with its rhythms. I love to dance, but I don’t like typical club music and the booty-shaking just to booty-shake dancing that doesn’t require much talent or grace. Most Latin-style dances are sexy without being trashy. I just attended a Mexican wedding, and I loved their dance floor. There were so many “free” dances. You don’t need a partner. It’s as though everyone on the floor is your partner – guys and girls. Which was good for me as there were no single guys that I could see!
* I like working outside. It is satisfying to see the work I put into the landscaping flourish – on its own, mostly, as I do my best to have a low-maintenance yard.
* I like planning trips – whether to visit old friends or a new country.
An important lesson for me is to stop trying to make certain activities fun for me. By now I’m fairly sure of what I like and don’t like. Not to say I won’t be trying new things, but if there is nothing appealing about an activity to me – I’ll say no. And fill my time with my own ideas of fun.
Last week’s challenge was to give proofs of love. I wanted to do this with someone I’m not necessarily close to. In this case, I picked my sister-in-law. She and my brother are living several states away, and they are expecting their first baby (the entire family’s first baby) in May. They’re not going to be visiting before the due date, and none of the family/friends from either side are coming up until the baby’s birth or after. So I’m arranging a long-distance baby shower. I’ve picked a week for all family and friends interested to send gifts and cards. I’m imagining her having a week of surprises. My brother is in on it, and he’ll be decorating their apartment with supplies I send him.
This week’s resolution is to not expect praise or appreciation. That’s going to be hard for the challenge will extend to all areas of my life, including work. I’ve been feeling resentful towards my manager lately for just that – not giving praise or appreciation for her staff. But I have to remind myself that I didn’t choose nursing in order to receive praise.